Father's Love

These few days, I feel grateful as I now reading the gospel of Matthew. Every time I read this gospel, I feel God's grace more and more again. His grace is endless. His love endures forever! When I read the first chapter, I can always see God's grace. He had put Tamar, Rut, and  Uria's wife (Bathseba) in the genealogy of Jesus Christ. Tamar slept with her father-in-law, Rut was a Moabitess, and Bathseba was an unfaithful wife. How could a holy God set those sinners in the genealogy of Jesus Christ? Continue to the next chapter, I read on how the Magi visited baby Jesus. They were also gentiles, but once again God gave them a privilege to know that the King of kings was born so they could come and worship Jesus. Was it a grace, wasn't it? Jesus taught and healed many people. He even ate with the sinners and tax collectors, including Matthew. When the Pharisees saw this, they asked his disciples, "Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?...

When struggles come to our way, often we think that we would be happier if the problems are solved. We would be happier if we earn more money. We would be happier if we always healthy. We would be happier if we marry a right person. We would be happier if we are famous. We would be happier if we...... There are a lot of requirements needed to be happy. We try our best to fulfill the requirements.... do we live happier? Almost all people live to be happy. Is happiness our life's purpose? What life is for than just to live happily ever after?

1 Chronicles 16:34 "Give thanks to the LORD for He is good; His love endures forever" I never had an idea of how His love endures, until today. My love to Bennett (one of my students) cannot endures all the pains he caused every time he punched me. For every discipline word I said, he punched me. I was about to give up, but God reminded me of His love. His love endures forever to those who keeps sinning and punching his heart! Could you imagine how great is His unfailing love? :')

Capek. Satu kata ini bisa cukup, bahkan terkadang kurang tepat untuk menggambarkan dengan jelas apa yang aku rasakan pada awal tahun ajaran ini. Awal tahun ajaran memang penuh tantangan. Tadinya aku cukup optimis dan berani menghadapi tahun ajaran ini, namun setelah 6 hari sekolah, aku tahu bahwa tahun ini tantangannya lebih berat. Kata 'capek' saja tidak cukup untuk menggambarkan betapa sakitnya tubuhku dipukuli dan ditendang (sebut saja) Bennett. Hampir setiap kali ditegur, Bennett marah dan memukul. 6 hari berturut-turut aku dipukuli. Aku harus berkali-kali bilang, " Bennett, stop! Tidak pukul-pukul Miss Novi lagi! Miss Novi juga tidak pukul Bennett, kan? " Di satu sisi kalimat ini untuk menghentikan kebiasaan Bennett yang suka memukul. Di sisi lain untuk mengingatkan diri sendiri bahwa apapun yang terjadi, Miss Novi tidak akan memukul Bennett. Tidak sama sekali.

Sebagai orang yang belum banyak berpengalaman di bidang dunia pendidikan, mestinya saya belum pantas berkomentar banyak mengenai bagaimana seharusnya orang tua membesarkan anak di dalam Tuhan. Namun pengalaman setahun terakhir menjadi guru adalah pengalaman yang berharga. Di akhir tahun ajaran ini justru saya melihat betapa SANGAT PENTING untuk membesarkan anak di dalam Tuhan. Didiklah orang muda menurut jalan yang patut baginya, maka pada masa tuanyapun ia tidak akan menyimpang dari pada jalan itu. (Amsal 22:6 )

Tahun ajaran 2013/2014 sudah hampir berakhir. Report card anak-anak sudah harus siap. Bahkan komentar naratif-nya sudah jadi. Tahun pertamaku mengajar hampir selesai. Kalau dipikir-pikir lagi, selama setahun terakhir, apa yang sudah anak-anak pelajari? Bagaimana mereka bertumbuh di kelasku? Sejujurnya, aku nggak merasa berjasa besar. Alasan pertama, aku merasa masih banyak sekali kekurangan. Sebagai fresh graduate teacher , setiap hari adalah hari pertama dan pengalaman pertama mengajar. Sampai hari ini kadang-kadang aku masih bertanya-tanya dengan tidak mengerti, misalnya mengapa tiba-tiba seorang anak menangis di kelas atau bagaimana mengajarkan suatu materi pelajaran yang baru. Alasan kedua, anak-anak TK zaman sekarang sudah pinter-pinter. Setiap hari rajin les calistung plus bahasa Inggris. Belajarnya juga sangat ketat dan intensif, nggak pake acara main-main seperti kegiatan belajar di sekolah. Dari 19 murid di kelas, aku cuma merasa berjasa sama satu orang anak. Dia nggak les ...

I thought these twelve months were enough to accept this lost. Although there was almost no tears for these last few months, I found myself was in a deep sorrow when the date turned to be April 28. So it was and is still hurt for me to lost my dad. Even I found myself could not stop to cry. Nothing and no one could help, just like in the song that the people sang a year ago to comfort us: Tak satupun dapat menghiburku Tak seorangpun dapat menolongku Hanya Yesus jawaban hidupku (No one could comfort me No one could help me Only Jesus, the answer of my life)