Could we talk to you right out of our hearts for a few minutes? It is awkward for us to talk about something of this nature, in person, so we thought we would write our feelings. We are young men who have been saved and filled with the Holy Spirit. We desperately want to live for Christ and not follow the ways of the world. Since we are indwelt with the “Holy” Spirit, we feel in our hearts that we should live “holy” lives. After all, our bodies are the temple, the sanctuary, the place where the “Holy” Spirit lives and makes His home.
We know that guys and girls are affected differently, so since we desperately want to follow hard after God, could we kindly and respectfully ask you to help us with a few things?
We realize that girls are primarily stimulated or turned on by “touch.” But did you know that guys are turned on by “sight?” So when you are “aroused” (sexually awakened) by a guy’s “touch,” we are in the same way aroused by mere “sight.” Let us explain. When we see girls who are dressed in a suggestive, revealing, provocative, teasing, tantalizing manner, our sexual desires are aroused. Our bodies are then affected.
To be absolutely candid, let us give you some examples of what we are referring to:
If you are wearing a blouse that barely meets the waist of your slacks and some of your skin shows while you are moving around, or simply while you are walking, sitting, or kneeling, our minds are geared to wonder what more of your body would look like further up….This causes our bodies to respond biologically, and suddenly we are fighting a war in our minds and bodies. And that war of lust is continuing often long, even hours, after you are gone.
We (as christian men, who are trying to live a holy life) hate this, because our “righteous man” wants to think pure thoughts….
When you wear low-cut tops which are in any degree revealing, or when you bend over, and they are revealing, this again causes us big problems in the flesh. Or if the back is out of your top, we automatically think that you do not have the undergarment on, and the Spirit and the flesh begin to fight again. Or when we see any glimpse of your undergarments, such as straps and the like, we have trouble.What we are trying to say is this: If it is not for sale, don’t advertise it. We really feel that the still small voice of the Holy Spirit speaks to you and nudges you when it is too tight, too short, too low, or too revealing. Will you listen to that voice? For the Scripture says, “Quench not the Spirit.” (1 Thess. 5:19).
Girls, do you know what we would really like? We would like to come among our Christian sisters and not have to fight and struggle in the flesh. We do not need to have to wrestle in the flesh at church or at church activities. We men, whether young, old, single or married, are faced with this every day among girls of the “world.” But we would like to have rest in our Spirit man when we come among Christian girls. After all, doesn’t the Scripture tell us to “come out from among the world and be you separate, saith the Lord.” (2 Cor. 6:17) It also tells us that “all that is in the world, the lust of the eye, and the lust of the flesh, is not of the Father, but is of the world.” (1 John 2:15) We are the church, not the world.
We know that people often use the verse, “Man looketh on the outward appearance, but God looketh on the heart,” (1 Sam. 16:7) to condone anything they wish to wear. This is one of the most misused/used out-of-context verses in the Bible. Conversely, the fact is, if your heart is pure, your outward appearance will be modest….
Girls can be fashionable and modest at the same time. To be honest, we respect you more when your appearance is modest, as the Scripture commands in 1 Timothy 2:9. We really do not want the kind of girl who dresses provocatively, for we know that if we marry her, she will still be that way in the presence of other men once we are married.
We know that we have Christian responsibilities toward girls, too. We must be careful to portray ourselves properly. We must treat you like ladies. If we are really committed Christian guys, we will strive to treat you like Jesus would. After all, you are daughters of God.
Thank you, dear Christian sisters, for hearing our hearts on this subject. Once we have conveyed the truth of the matter to you, you become responsible before God for what you do with the truth. We really are “our brother’s keeper.” (Genesis 4:9.) We know that there is a “cult of conformity” in our generation, but we as Christians “march to the beat of a different drummer.”
Please, girls, do not say, “I don’t care,” but help us in these last days to live as close to Jesus as we can.
Thank you so much. Sincerely, “Committed Christian Guys”